Divide and conquer..................................not!

You know the film 'Clash of the Titans' well that is actually based on what happens in my household.

Granted chez moi it is a low-budget version of it but basically the plot of family members not getting on and causing mayhem in the household is quite present.

So like a film this is how it takes place;

1st Child enters a room looking for a sibling to bother (okay maybe not exactly looking for someone to bother but definately looking for 'something' to do)
2nd Child does not want to be bothered and therefore gets into 'defense' mode (this defense mode can take on many forms, shouting, hitting, throwing stuff at sibling, there even has been a case of biting!)
3rd Child either decides to be the peacemaker or joins in with the fight (either way he or she will also end up with injuries!)

Then follows lots of special effects - mostly shouting, stamping feet, slamming doors (well this is a low-budget version) and then someone gets hurt and cries and then I hear that sweet sound of
"MAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
been screamed around the house in different voices until someone finds me
(I really need to find better hiding places)

This does not happen on a daily basis, only on days ending in 'y'!

I check for injuries, any cuts and bruises, any loose teeth, the usual inspection then rant like a fish-wife for five minutes, once I get my breath back I then become like Zeus I pass a sentence - everyone is 'banished' to their rooms and are 'forbidden' to speak each other.

Then calm reigns in the household and along come the closing credits with the words
THE END............................................or is it.

The first 30 minutes are calm and then I will hear a bedroom door creak open really quietly and Zeus-like I bellow up the stairs
"where are you going?"
a squeaky voice answers
"getting a drink/going to the toilet/finding my limb that fell off during the fight"

Then there is the whispering and patter of feet so been god-like and nosey I go to check it out and that is when I find the three of them all together in one room playing a game together like little angels and thats when I would like to turn into Medusa and turn the little blighters into stone!

Way back when I had more than 5 brain cells (B.C. before children) the idea of having lots of children seemed such a good idea but the thing we forget is that once we get past two kids you are actually outnumbering the adults in your household unless of course your other half is a big child and ah well can't help you there.

Of course you can attempt "divide and conquer" but this only works when you are using the following items - sweets, ice-cream, television and if all else fails - money!(technically can be seen as protection money).

There can be alternative endings (do not have to wait for the DVD box set to see this) they grow out of it, get bored by it or find quieter ways of annoying each other.

Ah bliss, the joys of parenthood.